Thursday, July 21, 2011



Here is a laundry list of theories regarding what actually "causes" SIDS and Daddy's sarcastic responses to all of them. I know that I read too much and pay too much attention to idiots, especially this (ref) "author", if you can call her that, but reading about what may have taken you from me educates me, makes me ask new questions, angers me, and saddens me...all that said, it helps me cope with your death. The sarcasm helps a lot too. So, without further ado, the list...

1. Toxic Infection (No drinking the Windex, kinda knew that one from the get go)

2. Toxic Gas (No farting around babies after burrito night, got that down)

3. Vitamin C Deficiency (Who needs breast milk when you can have orange juice?)

4. Brain Stem Defect (This sounds too much like a Toyota recall)

5. Triple Risk Model (Eat, sleep, poop...seems risky to me)

6. Flaw in the Immune System (Is this like a fly on the windscreen?)

7. Metabolic Disorder (Steroid use at such an early age...what were you thinking?)

8. Stress (Yeah, you had it so tough being loved and cuddled all the time...whatever)

9. Nephron Deficiency (This one is all Greek to me)

10. Nutrient Deficiencies (What do the nutrients' shortcomings have to do with anything?)

11. Birth Defect (Now this sounds more like a GM recall, maybe even Ford or Chrysler)

12. Abnormalities in the Brain (Daddy would have been dead a long time ago...ask anyone how abnormal my brain is)

13. Carbon Dioxide Rebreathing (No second hits of the tailpipe, ok? No, seriously, ok!?)

14. Ammonia (Cat pee is pretty nasty and pungent stuff)

15. Abnormalities in Brain Receptors (See number 12)

16. Failure to Develop (What are you now? Somalia?)

17. Cell Defect (Why do I picture it with 200 other cells on a raft floating from Cuba?)

18. Sleep-induced Arrhythmia (Don't worry, I can't keep rhythm that well either)

19. QT Interval (This is a measure of ventricular repolarization, which is the process in which the membrane, after depolarization, is polarized again with the myocardium, with positive charges on the outer and negative charges on the inner surface...Huh?!?)

20. Apparent Life Threatening Event (Ummmm...isn't being born an apparent life threatening event? just sayin' folks)

With that being out of my system, there is a site (ref) with really good information describing what all of these things mean. I just had no desire to post it all here and ruin a perfectly profound post such as this one.

Love you son

1 comment:

  1. Steven,

    Thank you for giving me a good reason to laugh. You insite on such a tragic things as SIDS have helped to lighten up what has been a down week for me. I'm sure Colin is laughing as well and telling everyone just how funny his daddy is!! Keep it coming, your words are helping so many of us that are going through similar situations. Take care!