Monday, November 21, 2011

Is the Grief Process Different?

Colin,
As per usual, your Daddy was reading about SIDS and trying to find any new research or anything for that matter to help with the daily struggle of acceptance and moving forward since your death. Daddy didn't find anything new on the research front, but did find something quite interesting on the bereavement front (ref) as food for thought...the notion of "crisis" in relation to the grief process. So, your Daddy decided to share it with others because so many points are "spot on", as Mommy says. Below is an excerpt from the article.

Is the grief process different?

"When I teach crisis intervention, I often talk to my students about the notion of the "disequilibrium" that happens during a crisis. I would like to pose that bereavement professionals conceptualize this situation as having two phases: first as crisis, and then later as grief. Crisis disrupts our sense of balance, fairness, and rightness.  Its suddenness is jarring, its intensity overwhelms our ability to do the things we need to do every day, and it is often marked by shock, anger, guilt and blame. People feel singled out and separated from the rest of the world when in crisis. The relational grief process over the child whose death is labeled "preventable" is very likely to be delayed during this more intense disequilibrium from shock, blame, guilt, and anger which has been even more intensified by the diagnostic label.
"

The only thing Daddy wishes he knew at this point is how long the delay is because he is tired of feeling completely out of balance over something so unfair and just plain wrong. You should still be here with Me, Mommy, and Ava. We miss you!

I love you!
Daddy

1 comment:

  1. Yup. Sounds pretty spot on to me too.

    Sending you lots of hugs and prayers.

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